No real post for today? Fer fuck's sake.
Lady Grantham, please accept my sincerest and gravest apologies. You see, I am drunk and want to watch TV. Your show, in fact. I'm so drunk and want to get off on retro English awkward silences and imagine kissing their stiff upper lips and fantasize about their privileged sweat dripping onto my abdomen.
Don't worry Mary, I'll stay away from all Turkish diplomats.
Argh, I suck.
Point taken.
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Okay, Glamazons! Today's giveaway is a Tarte for True Blood eye makeup palette:
I bought this a few months ago and although I've opened the box and looked upon it lovingly many times, I actually haven't used it. So I am giving it away, hopefully to someone who can do it more justice than creepy staring.
The palette contains 17 full-size eyeshadows, ranging from everyday natural to glittery fabulous, primer, aqua gel eyeliner, and mascara. Because it was limited edition, it is no longer for sale in retail stores, but right now it's going for about $80 on eBay.
So, what I want to know is: Which character on "True Blood" would you most like to do bad things with?
You know the deal: Comment below to enter to win! I will randomly draw a winner on Friday. Good luck!
PS: Although I love me some Eric AND Bill, I'd have to go for Pam first. She's so fierce and she swings my way? Jackpot!
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Erin asks: If you had a day to do whatever (and whoever) you wanted without consequences, barring any obstacles or even physics or the laws of time and space, what would you do?
Two words, my friend: SMITHS REUNION.
Morrissey and Marr: I can make them get back together, I know it!
After that, I would definitely take the day off, send the kids to school, and bend space-time to accomodate a lot of hedonism and world travel. I'd flag down The Doctor (not the current one, but David Tennant, ohoho yes) and make him take me all over the universe in a blue Police Box. I'd definitely visit my friends strewn across our little blue planet and invite them to join us.
Mmmmm...lovely
The day would culminate in a Last Supper-themed feast/rave/orgy/photo shoot styled by David LaChappelle where Morrissey is Jesus, I am the Virgin Mary, and the apostles are my favorite drag queens and members of the Stone Roses. Lady Gaga will be Magdalene, washing everyone's feet with her mouth. There would be real flying cherubim and the spread would be epic: Moroccan, Ethiopian, Korean, Indian, Greek, Mexican, and those are just the models, dahling! The food would be even more delicious. Vomitorium would be off to the right, of course.
Because of the time travel aspect, I have to assume this already happened because LaChappelle has already captured it:
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My blogroll and Twitter feed were abuzz with comments about Christina Aguilera's performance of the National Anthem on Sunday's Super Bowl. I actually missed the game, deciding instead to go to Disneyland, but I had to check it out for myself:
All I could think of was, "WTF." But not "Christina Aguilera, WTF," but rather "America, WTF."
In today's nano-judged world, where you can elicit a million belly laughs by pasting the word "FAIL" in white sans serif font on any image, and where even the world's most beautiful people supposedly need the help of a Photoshop expert every time they pose for pictures, Ms. Aguilera's lyrical gaffe is more than enough to fill one's social media tittering quota for the day.
But do you want to know what I saw in this video? I saw a consummate professional teaching us a lesson on how to handle crisis.
Po Bronson, in his book Nurture Shock, introduced me to the concept of stick-to-itiveness. It turns out that when we praise our kids for being smart or fast or any other innate talent, we don't actually raise their self-esteem; by praising something that seems to be "either you got it or you don't," kids feel powerless when faced with challenges and actually feel less confident in their abilities to overcome the challenges. Rather, if you praise the kids' effort and stick-to-itiveness, they feel motivated to put in further effort, i.e., something they are in control of. A quick summary of the book can be read here.
I am always looking for ways I can teach stick-to-itiveness to my kids because I am a person constantly crippled by the spectre of perfection. As Voltaire said, "The perfect is the enemy of the good." And Christina Aguilera's performance was a great example of the amazing good that can come out of imperfection.
I think while she was singing that line, Ms. Aguilera knew she messed up. Of course she did; she has sung the National Anthem countless times before. And without pausing, starting over, apologizing, or in any way pulling the focus away from the song itself, she decided to let her mistake go and corrected the lyrics mid-sentence. She didn't even stop the note she was on. In front of tens of millions of live witnesses, she just. kept. singing. That is PhD-level stick-to-itiveness, and that is what separates her from lesser entertainers and performers of every stripe, and that is what we should be focusing on if we want to show our kids how to truly succeed in life.
Dory knew it all along!
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What do you do the day after an epic 7th birthday bash?
This.
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The Original Desperate Housewife
I recently finished all three seasons of "Mad Men," cramming 2-3 episodes a night alone in the bedroom while Tim and the kids were asleep. Well, to be truly accurate, I watched them with Rosie and Cheep Cheep. Jon Hamm gets all the chicks, I swear.
I actually watched the first season last year. After I finished it, all I felt was this deep anger. Watching Betty Draper's suffocating life as a 60's housewife made me feel suffocated in empathy. Every time I was left alone with the children, I felt her resentment and loneliness too. When I interacted with Tim, I felt this compelling need to be ultra-charming and proper, setting my face into a tight smile the way the wives did in the show. I wanted to tear my hair out when I didn't have dinner on the table right when Tim got home, or if I forgot to pack something in Isaac's backpack. I wondered to myself how I would be able to tell whether Tim had affairs at work or not. It affected me so deeply, I had to take a break from the show for several months.
However, people whom I respect still kept talking about "Mad Men," and with the fourth season starting up this summer, I decided to give season 2 a chance. I finally was able to get to know the characters and how they carved out these lives during such a difficult era. I was even able to imagine my own self fitting into that society. Granted, there wasn't a single Asian person besides that hot waitress at the Chinese restaurant, but before, I just couldn't believe my spirit could survive in that climate at all. But now I can see glimpses of today's "modern woman" in the female characters: Joan's unflappable competence and titanium spine, Peggy's desires to please and to disentangle herself from her family, Mona's privileged bemusement and wit, and yes, even Betty's ice-cold, doe-eyed martyrdom.
There are a few downsides to this show, in my opinion. First and foremost, I can't stop thinking about smoking. I quit shortly after I graduated from college (to all you coders out there, isn't the 2 a.m. cigarette break after finally fixing a nagging bug a true religious experience?), but I am extremely tempted to start up again. Also, since I work from home, I keep passing by our booze stash and wondering if whiskey truly helps bring out creativity and focus as it is portrayed in the show. Honestly, that ad agency should be called Cigarettes and Alcohol instead of Sterling and Cooper. Maybe the show is even funded by tobacco and booze corporations, who knows? The third thing is that I want to wear those clothes. But in order to really wear the kind of garments those women wore, you'd have to have a brick house body or some really strong foundational garments. I actually found out what company the actresses use, and am tempted to buy this monstrosity:
Where does the pee go?
My only complaint is that the bra part isn't bullet-y enough to make me a Joan. But then again, no one on earth looks like Joan except for Christina Hendricks. Rowr!
Danger: Curves Ahead
Sigh. I would have loved to try to make my way through the 60's. I would have made a hell of a secretary.
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I did a bit of blog redecorating. Now to the left, those of you who wish to speak live to a REAL LIVE JULIE can do so through the power of instant messaging (that is, if I'm online and not working at the time).
How are things going for you guys? I am still super-busy with work, and now Isaac has "graduated" from his daycare and we still have 2 weeks until kindergarten starts. I have nothing planned for him, so I think I'm just going to throw him a dustpan and brush and bark at him to clean until I get hungry and then bark at him to take the car and bring Mama back some In N Out. In all seriousness, though, he will probably be safe in the arms of Noggin and the Disney Channel while I try to stay employed. Poor kid.
BTW, did my blog title bring a certain mid-90's Jodeci ballad in your head? You're welcome. Here's the video if you want to reminisce:
In other news, I will be attending a Kimchi Mamas Meet-Up in the Bay Area on September 12. Details are still up in the air, but one thing will be guaranteed: I will be childless and husbandless, so I will be on my worst behavior. Balls to the walls, ladies!
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