Dear People of the Sun,
If you are going to Coachella this year, you must be either younger and/or less encumbered than I. Congratulations! I am so super-jealous. I love you and want to be you, because this year is going to be amazing.
Just one favor: will at least one of you please allow me to live vicariously through you?
Here are my suggestions for this year. I've taken care of all the details, I just need you to follow my directions. Feel free to print multiple copies and distribute them to anyone who looks lost. Thank you, child.
Love,
Geisha School Dropout
Friday:
Saturday:
Sunday:
