Isaac learned about writing poetry in class. Here are a couple of my favorites; they just scream "SECOND GRADE BOY!":
The Eyeball Toast
Eww
Gross!
Who put eyeballs
in my toast?
Maybe the jelly
slid under the bed
and in his place
are eyeballs instead.
HMMM...
Strange.
But it's ok
that some things change.
Weapons
Swords, guns
daggers, too.
They are here
for me and you.
Cannons, tanks,
they're so loud.
When they hit,
they make a cloud.
They could just
blow up a tree,
and now they are
after me!
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Congratulations to commenter #4, Dan, who won the polka dot knife set! His guess was:
You the camel
Tim the penguin
Isaac the snake
Emma the mouse
I actually know Dan "in meatspace" (actually, I knew the large majority of entrants, which made me very happy), so I feel no qualms with ribbing him for getting Emi's name wrong (thanks, Uncle Dan!). But otherwise, he nailed it, like most of you did.
The story behind the animals was: Emi and her bossy nature. She commissioned, rather demanded, that her daddy draw us this way one day at a Chinese restaurant. Her inner world is interesting, no? I knew I shouldn't have smoked that peyote while I was pregnant with her...
Anyway, I won't be able to really post until later today because all day I'll be chaperoning Isaac's class on a field trip to a science museum! Zoiks! So here are some pictures of what happened this week in our little world:
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I recently came across this Forbes article by Jessica Hagy, the genius behind one of my favorite webcomics, Indexed. It's called "Nine Dangerous Things You Were Taught in School," and it made a variety of fine points about how success later in life isn't necessarily attained by the behaviors most rewarded in a school setting: compliance, performance on standardized tests, and adherence to majority rule.
I decided to present the nine points to Isaac, our resident 2nd grader and Quintessential Good Student, as true/false questions, and this is what he had to say about them:
1. The people in charge have all the answers.
False: Because sometimes the teacher doesn't check your work and somebody else does. That means someone else has the answer sheet.
2. Learning ends when you leave the classroom.
False: Because sometimes you have recess, then you come back to class. Then you have to learn more.
3. The best and brightest follow the rules.
False: Because sometimes they don't follow the rules. Then they get in trouble.
4. What the books say is always true.
False: Because most books are fiction, and fiction means that it's not true.
5. There is a very clear, single path to success.
False: Because there's more than one path. Sometimes you learn different ways. Sometimes you learn by reading, sometimes you learn by listening and watching, other times you just learn by following the instructions!
6. Behaving yourself is as important as getting good marks.
True: Because if you get good grades, then that means you're really working hard, and if you have good behavior, that also means you're trying to work hard and never give up. No one wants to be the smart person who's really mean.
7. Standardized tests measure your value.
False: Because you can show your value without doing the STAR testing. [Editor's Note: They are in the middle of STAR testing right now.] For example, you can show it by your facial expression. *smirk*
8. Days off are always more fun than sitting in the classroom.
False: Because you could have camps, and camps are boring sometimes! Staying at home could be fun, but usually your parents have to work and you have to keep finding fun things to do by yourself, and that's boring.
9. The purpose of your education is your future career.
False: Because you can do dirty jobs but still get good grades. For example, you can be really smart, but you can go be a plumber, which is kinda boring. You can also help with sewer problems.
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The class has started fiction writing, and this is Isaac's first attempt. He cracks me up, this kid.
"Out Numbered," by Isaac
One day at school 100 and 10 were rivals. 100 bragged to everyone smaller than him. 0 was constantly being teased. 0 usually had liked spending time with 10. 100 was probably the meanest student. At least ten times a day 100 had gone to detention.
I am hearing him say his favorite words: bully, mean, teasing, and some others you're better off not knowing. Sheesh. Even I get teassed by 100. I'm moving. Maybe to the Yukon. Either that or I'll move to another school.
One day 101 came to school. 100 then realized that he was way bigger. Then he realized that having a bigger number doesn't really matter that much.
THE END
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I hope I'm on the good list this year because I'm really looking forward to Christmas and I try hard to be good all year long. For example, I try hard in school, I help do chores, particepate what my teacher, Mr. K says, and feed my dog every day. Santa, do you deliver presents to half of the world 1 night and the other the next? OK, now I'll tell you my Christmas list. It's a nerf gun, a helicopter, and a angry bird plush toy. But, most of all, just snow.
Love your friend,
Isaac
LOVE EMILY
PLEASE I LOVE YOU SANTA
SANTA I HOPE I GAT A BARBIE SANTA
EMI
(picture of Barbie doll with a dog, and some Angry Birds on the bottom)
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Isaac's writing sample this week was 5 pages long, and it chronicled the apparently epic bowling night we had a few weeks ago. My favorite sentence: "'Giggle, giggle,' I whisper to myself." How creepy is that?
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A Trip to Cal Bowl
One lovely, beautiful evening I was ready to go to a bowling stadium called Cal Bowl! I felt as if I was an angel in heaven. It was about 5:46 p.m. when we left home and 5:56 p.m. when we got there. They're was at least sixty-seven bowling alleys in the bowling stadium. Inside my cranium I thought that either I'm just imagining things or I'm seeing things again. I went with my lovable, lovely Mom and my noisy, whiny, and snory sister named Emily which is a scaredy-cat! "Giggle, giggle," I whisper to myself.
The bowling stadium looked shiny, neat, unbreakable, and fashonable. I started to look around. I'm starting to like it here! Then Mom said that friends were coming to bowl with us! I was almost going to faint! I was obviously jumping up and down with exitment right that second Mom told me that piece of "information."
It was almost 6:15 p.m. which is about dinner-time for us. I was almost famished. There were about 4 restaurants. I picked the first one of all 4 restaurants. They didn't have names on them. Inside, there was a TV, 24 chairs, 12 tables, and the manager. I ordered shrimp and mac-n-cheese, Mom ordered fish and a salad with ranch dressing, and Emily ordered...Well, I forgot.
We waited otuside the restaurant for food in the bowling alley. We waited for about 10 mins. It felt like it was an immence amount of time! "Yawwwn," I yawn to myself. Now I'm famished for sure! I was also thirsty. I felt as if I was in a drowt. Finally, we got our dinner. We all ate on a bench next to the loud, noisy bowling alleys.
After we're done, all our friends arrived. First was the dad, then the child and Mom. I was a little shy and nervous, but I got used to it. "Blah blah blah," they say to each other. We were going to get our bowling shoes. We had to take off one of our own shoes. Then we got to our bowling lane. Our lane number was 65. We all typed in our names. I thought the pins would be battered.
Anyways, Moms friends dad bowled first. He was an excellent, fantastic, unbievable pro at bowling. He got a stupendous strike! We were amazingly still for a minute. Then an aplause broke the silence. So it went on. Mommy bought us chips with melted, creamy, delicious cheese.
My score at the end was 124, Moms was 65, moms friend was 221, and Emi's score was 42. Finally, we said goodbye to our friends and went home. It was a stupendous outting.
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"Emily, My Sister" by Isaac, 10/25/2011
My funny, noisy, whiny sister is named Emily. You can call her Emi for short. She goes to a Jewish school called the JCC. She likes to play there. Around 2:35, she does Spanish class. She mostly gets to learn easy word. For example...they practice doing her numbers, you know, uno, doss, quadro. Then after school, she plays pretend. When it's reading time, she always wants to read the tale Peter Pan. She snores at night and I hardly get my sleep. So I push her off the bed, and under the bed with an animal with her. She's four years old and her birthday's in January. I wish I had some earmuffs. END
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Anna asks: ok then, what are you wearing?
Ha ha ha! Too bad I didn't answer this yesterday; today I am already dressed for "the outside," so a blue and white striped t-shirt and jeans. Most of yesterday involved a nightgown.
do you ever just walk around the house naked anymore?
Unfortunately for my childrens' eyeballs and future standards of beauty, yes. Not as much as I used to, but in a house with just one bathroom for all 4 occupants, there are compromises that must be made to accomodate all needs. I definitely don't flaunt it or tease them with my nudity, it's more like going to a bathhouse where sometimes it's around.
is there anything Isaac and Emi could ever say or do that would be un-bloggable?
Oh goodness, there are lots of things they say or do that I don't blog for fear of someone getting the wrong idea. I also try not to say anything *too* embarrassing and try to keep things upbeat, so when they eventually read my posts one day, they won't be too mortified. And thanks to Flickr stats, any pictures that get picked up by strange sites with words like "childlove" in the URL get taken down. *shudder*
Usually, though, things don't get reported because they're hard to translate to this medium. Like the other day, Isaac drew a pig with a chick inside of it and the pig said, "Choink!" That was seriously the funniest thing that happened that day, but it's not that funny spelled out like this.
do you think your blog fully represents the person you are inside?
I think it represents a longer-winded, slightly censored, more "fit for human consumption" version of myself. Honestly, the majority of the time in "meatspace," I'm a lot more boring and quiet than the persona I have here, especially around the kids and the people I interact with because of them. But it's not like this persona is a fabrication or a role I have to act for; since you were once my officemate, I would hope you could attest to the fact that I am absolutely raunchy and inappropriate in real life as well.
Ideally, I would like this blog to be a place where I don't get too dark and dismal, or too vanilla, or too much of anything, because I want it to be enjoyable to read, as well as provide comfort and/or companionship for people who feel the way I feel sometimes. So I definitely think about the audience, what they might like, versus purely spouting off on whatever might be polluting my head at the moment. I also try to balance the kid vs. non-kid posts to show that parents, although we do think about our kids a whole lot, don't think about them 100% of the time.
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jooliyah asks:
What are your favorite Korean snacks?
I am partial to anju-type snacks, especially 쥐포 (dried file fish) and dried squid, the kinda smoky-flavored eggs (삶은 계란) they have at the jjimjilbang, and savory rice crackers, especially these spicy ones that come with peanuts (kaki no tane in Japanese, don't know the Korean name):
And of course, the more meal-type anju like jokbal, dubu kimchi, soondae, etc.! Oh! And 팥빙수 (shaved ice), but only if it has fresh fruit on it as well as the red beans, mochi pieces, and stuff.
When's the last time you came to Korea?
It was late May/early June 2009 for my dad's 환갑 (60th birthday). We went to Jeju Island and visited family members in various parts of Seoul. We should be making another trip out there within the year.
And top 5 favorite books.
Oh wow, that's a hard one. It changes all the time, it seems, but the following books are usually up there. In no particular order,
Books that should be up there if only I had the space include The Red Tent, Harry Potter, and The Hunger Games. :)
Thank you, jooliyah, for the awesome reminders that I need to curl up in bed with some crackers and a good book!
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Isaac just brought home another stack of Writers' Workshop papers, so I think this can be a regular column for the rest of the school year.
"If I Had Three Wishes," by Isaac (9/14/2011)
Boy, it's a beutiful Wedneday at school. But sometimes I get bored I want three wishes. I wish that I was president. This way I can't get bored as much becuase it's very, very busy. I also wish I was in the USA navy so I could fly a F-14!! I wonder if I could also ride a submarine! Or maybe a helicopter! Third wishes can be a little hard to grant. You can wish chocolate, toys, candy, etc. I would wish 1,000,000,000,000 toys. The End
"When I Grow Up," by Isaac (9/22/2011)
When I grow up I want to be president of the United States because I like making new laws and having spies. I think being president is exiting. Besides, if you were president of the United States, you'd get to go into the splendid, enchanted, one-hundred roomed, warm hearting White House. I often think about president Obama most of the time! I think Obama's family is beutiful! I wonder how many people could fit in the humongous White House. End
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