It's no secret that I worship at the altar of The Rock. No, not that former-wrestler-turned-Disney-star guy (although I do admit he is one delicious morsel), but good old-fashioned rock 'n roll. And if you asked me who the rockingest band of all time is, I would undoubtedly scream, "DEF LEPPARD, BABY!!!!"
Dude. Dude. Don't even argue with me on this one. Black Sabbath, Iron Maiden, Guns N Roses? They're all a bunch of flamboyant, makeup-wearing, retired theatre nerds, more into their costumes than their musicianship. Def Leppard is straight-up testosterone-filled, no bullshit, bash-your-head-in-with-a-pipe-they-welded-themselves Brits. No contest, sorry Ozzy. Not only does Joe Elliot have the ultimate metal voice and amazing range, but all the other band members are great singers and musicians in their own right! And hello, what other drummer rocks the kit with one arm and a pair of the fastest-moving feet in the business? They did their homework and created a sound that seamlessly combined bluesy rock like Zeppelin with glam-twinged stadium rock like Queen. Duuuuude, trust me on this one, there's no one that comes close!
Exhibit A, one of the best tributes to Rock 'n Roll ever written:
Exhibit B, one of the best tributes to blow jobs ever written:
I can go on, but by now you guys are probably too overwhelmed by the awesomeness. :P Anyway, Tim and I got to see them last weekend at Verizon Amphitheatre, and holy Moses, it was a religious experience. It was the first time for both of us, and we were both screaming and throwing up devil's horns and dancing in ways that were probably illegal in Irvine. The members of Def Leppard might be almost as old as my mom, but they can still WAIL, man! I now have a vision of the 50-year-old I want to be. I want to be the 50-year-old that fucking SHREDS.



